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9 Secrets On How To build your self esteem As a Woman

How to improve your self esteem for lasting self improvement

Growing up seeing all these beauty standards and all other great achievements every day, we as women started to face a lot of difficulties from our societies, and especially from social media until it became very difficult for us to maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves, we start to destroy ourselves without even knowing it. So in this post, I’ll show you 9 steps or more like ways how to build your self esteem as a woman.

  • Love yourself 

I know sometimes it can be a little difficult to love yourself especially if you don’t have any self-trust, this is, in my opinion, the first step to building your self-esteem as a woman.

We often hear the word Self love in the media, as the act of taking that calm bath or buying what you desire, or even some people misunderstood this word as being selfish, but it is deeper than this.

We women our relationship with ourselves is exactly like any other relationship, if you trust and treat yourself well, the relationship will bloom and both parties will benefit from it. So Self love is that beautiful connection between you and yourself, your inner world, how you treat yourself, how you think of yourself, and how you react to yourself in different situations.

From my personal experience, I found out that choosing to love myself no matter what life brings, is a total game-changer.
By choosing to be gentle with yourself in front of all challenges, and treat yourself kindly, yet evolve and develop yourself, a sense of self-worthiness not in an egoic way will start to emerge, and you will feel worthy of the best quality of life and its finest things, and in result, you will have higher self esteem effortlessly.

If you learn how to love yourself correctly, all the tips below will be easier for you to do!

Here are 100 amazing things to love about yourself!

  • Stop comparing yourself to others:

Every human being has their own charm, skills, and abilities. You can’t just compare a banana to an apple, each one of those is beautiful the way it is and each one has its own benefits and serves its own purpose. You’re different than the others, every time you try to compare your journey to theirs you will keep spotting differences, they have things you want and others want things you have and all this is normal!

If you stop comparing yourself to others and save that time to actually work for those things you want you’ll definitely get them sooner or later.

So to start building your self esteem is by stopping comparing yourself to others and keeping in mind that you don’t need to be like others to be successful or beautiful or whatever goal you want to achieve or whatever thing you want to get that others already got. 

  • Trust yourself more: 

 You trust a lot of people in your life, your teachers, your doctor, and many other people, but you still have some difficulties trusting yourself. Why? You know yourself way more than you know all these people, you know what you’re capable of, if you don’t know yet you just need to give yourself space and time to discover your abilities and skills. The more you learn new things, the more you discover new areas in yourself and that will make you trust yourself even more so your high self esteem will get higher.

Start by trusting yourself for the little things first, and then go to the bigger one, trust yourself that you’re capable of achieving great things in this life! 

You might find this post helpful: 5 Things Every Woman Should Know


  • Have goals and visions:

Setting goals and dedicating yourself to achieving them, working hard, and for your goals will definitely boost your confidence and it will show you what you’re actually capable of and that you’re way better than what you think.

Try to set and make a list of all the things you want to achieve., start with the small goals and as you work on them add more ideas and other bigger goals. Also, learning new habits and sticking to them can help too! Check these achievable monthly goals! And also here are more than 40 healthy habits you can start today.

As you keep practicing the habits you will choose, you’ll notice a big change and growth in your self love and, as a consequence, your self esteem will grow as well.

  • Others opinions don’t matter

Yes, I said it! I mean the good opinions are great but let’s be honest with ourselves for a second, we tend to adopt the negative opinions more and forget about the good positive ones. Others’ opinions are not who you are, it’s just what they see from their perspective and what they understand depending on their mindsets. You’re doing your best and you’re going at your own pace so why let others’ opinions destroy your confidence and self love. 

5 Mental Shifts to Stop Caring What People Think of You

  • Makeup can help too:

You’re beautiful the way you are, you may not see it because of all these standards in our society and because of all the reasons above (not loving yourself, letting others’ opinions mess with your head..) but you really are! But if you think you need a little boost to start seeing yourself beautiful you may try to use makeup (even though I don’t really recommend it) But if you see that it may help just do it! There is no harm in trying.

  • Know your worth:

Sometimes when you see that you haven’t achieved anything (I’m sure you have but we keep saying that due to low self esteem ) you start to feel like a failure and you think you’re worthless, I’m here to tell you that you’re wrong.

Your worth is not defined by your achievement or how much money you make or what you have in your life, you’re worthy, just because you’re this beautiful human being, so close you’re eyes now and repeat: I’m worthy no matter what. 

I mentioned this after “loving yourself” and “stop caring and comparing yourself to others” because I believe that once you master these 2 tips first, you’ll be all ready working on this one unconsciously. Once you start loving yourself properly and you stop comparing your life to others’ lives you’ll know that you’re worthy and nothing in your life will shake this belief and you’ll notice that this self worth will give you a huge power to boost your self esteem.

  • Find someone who compliments you:

This step is not necessary but it’s important in my opinion. Having someone by your side who loves you and cares about you, either a family member, a partner, or a friend will help you to build your self esteem by encouraging you, giving you compliments, and simply showing you how great you are since you can’t see it. If you don’t have that person is totally fine, you can still be that person for yourself, and if you do have someone you need to start listening to them when they give you compliments or when they cheer you up.

  • Stop acting like a victim:

Acting as a victim is an act of making others responsible for your emotions, and how you live, this mindset can be comfortable because you will not feel responsible for the negative things in your life, but it will also make you feel weak in your life conditions, and that will lead to untrusting yourself and your capacity, which results also as low self esteem.

So to prevent such a cycle, it is more beneficial for you to start learning and wiring the mindset of responsibility and stop acting like a victim, with each life situation, you can slowly face the challenges and gain mastery over them, as result not only you will feel capable of handling your life but also you will feel freer, more worthy and more confidant.


These in my opinion are the most important points that will help you gain your self-esteem back. I tried to make them as steps but you can start with the one that will resonate the most with you, just remember: building your self esteem or a healthy relationship with yourself in general takes time, so don’t rush it just give yourself time to grow and enjoy your journey!

Sending all the love to you!

Now it’s your turn to tell me: How’s your self esteem? And have you already tried one of those tips to build it?

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These were the 9 ways to improve your self esteem as a woman for greater self improvement!

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34 thoughts on “9 Secrets On How To build your self esteem As a Woman”

  1. These are great tips. My parents used to drill these tips into my head as a kid. But sometimes you have to remind yourself even now. Thanks for sharing!

    1. Totally agree with you on all the 9 points. Loving myself, not comparing myself to others, knowing my worth and trusting myself are the points I have followed my adult life.

  2. I am glad you listed “Love Yourself” first because I totally believe on that. Thank you for this post, worth sharing.

  3. These are some amazing tips to boost your self-esteem. I think lower self-esteem developed when we were a child and it was mostly because of negative people around us but we can work on it at any stage of life and the most important thing is to trust yourself.

    1. I totally agree! Environment and people around us can affect us, especially at a young age. The most important thing is to keep loving ourselves and everything else will become easier to achieve.

  4. If ever there was a post I needed to see today it was this one. I’ve been struggling with myself lately. These are perfect reminders!

  5. I used to struggle a lot in finding my worth as a woman. And a lot of these things you mentioned have helped me find my worth and increase my self esteem. I`d say comparison is the worst thief.

    1. Yes comparison is the worst! That wrong idea of being less than others and those others are better than us makes our charm and light disappear. We just need to change this idea by remembering that We’re all beautiful and worthy the way we are.

  6. These are wonderful tips one could follow and imbibe in the system to bring self above from the petty classes of ego and reality. You have created a lovely list.

  7. Great tips and an important topic! I especially like the last one, if something’s wrong, it’s best to try to fix it and not just blame others or think that it’s just the way things are.

    1. You’re right! Once we believe that we have control over our lives and it’s not just “others mistakes” or as you said ” that’s just the way things are” we can start achieving great things

  8. Great article! Thanks for sharing! I’ve been practicing some of these tips for years now, and I find that self-love is both powerful and healing.

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